


So Far Away

by cutsiecastiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aromantic Castiel, Aromantic Dean, HS!AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-24
Updated: 2015-08-24
Packaged: 2018-04-17 02:54:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4649505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cutsiecastiel/pseuds/cutsiecastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“C’mon Cas. This place is too small. We can’t be ourselves here, we could make for a big city, we could live.” Dean looks excited, as if he honestly thinks they could do it. “I was going to leave anyway; the only thing here for me is Sammy but I already know he’s gonna make it farther than I ever could. This place could burn for all I care. But you could come with me.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	So Far Away

Dean Winchester was a hurricane; a tsunami; a whirlwind of emotions; a natural disaster just waiting to happen and take down as many people as he possibly could, and Castiel was enamored.  

He wouldn’t call it love, not by a long shot. Castiel doesn’t know what love is even supposed to _be,_ what it’s supposed to _mean_. And he had to suffer through Gabriel singing “I wanna know what love is!” too often growing up to even _care_ about it. He’d heard the term aromantic before and he wasn’t sure if it really suited him or if the right person hadn’t come along just yet, but he knew that romantic attraction was one of the lowest priorities of his.

And besides, Castiel is near certain that if he were to fall in love, it wouldn’t be with someone like Dean. He smokes too much, for one. He perpetually stinks of it and the minty smell of the gum he chews when he isn’t smoking. At any break in the day, or hell, probably most of his classes, he can be found smoking under the bleachers or behind the one dark corner of the school that no one goes to. And Cas knows he drinks; knows he drinks like he thinks he’ll find the answer to all his problems at the bottom of the bottle. It’s too bad that empty bottles couldn’t save his life anyway.

He did however have feelings for him; that much Castiel was sure of. Dean was his best friend, had been since junior year of high school. Everyone else only knew the smoking, alcoholic, rebel, with a no care attitude because if no one else is gonna care about his problems, why should he? But Cas, Cas also knew the sweet, caring, and intelligent teddy bear that Dean also was. He would act like a tough kid but only mostly to make his father happy, no matter that he says he doesn’t listen to him anyway. He reads Vonnegut and Alan Moore comics, he listens to Led Zeppelin and could probably name song they’ve ever made, and he could probably tell you everyone who’s ever told him that he was a loner, all while keeping up his bad boy image. He can sing and play guitar but he only ever does for his little brother and Cas when he gets lucky, and whenever he’s around the rest of his friends he sings off-key even after everyone else tells him to stop. He makes mistakes, he’s human, and he isn’t worried about having to grow up. Grownups don’t really understand him anyway.  The little things were what interested Cas; these little facts and quirks were what made him care.

And maybe it didn’t hurt that they’ve hooked up once or twice or ten times or more, and maybe sometimes there was more cuddling than fucking. Castiel wasn’t sure _what_ his feelings for this boy were, and maybe it was similar to how Anna explained how a crush feels, but as far as Castiel knew for sure, it was the most he had cared for anyone aside from his siblings, and that care was different anyway. But neither of them was looking for love or any similar attachments so it was okay.

All they either of them wanted, was someone to lean on when they needed.

“Come _on_ , Cas. Wait a year before going off to one of the million and one colleges that’ve accepted you. You don’t need school for 8 years straight, you can take this one little break.” Dean had been trying to convince Cas to travel the country with him instead of going straight off to college for the past hour, but he had yet to get anywhere.

“Oh please, my parents would never let me. They’re uninterested in anything but my success, so they’ve planned to ship me off to _somewhere_ so that I’m out of their hair since before I was born.” Neither of them brought up the fact that most of the colleges Cas had been accepted to were in different countries, which would mean they’d be separated and who knows how often they’d end up talking.

“Let’s leave then.” There’s a glint in Dean’s eyes, one not unfamiliar to Cas, but also not reassuring. “We could do it. Pack some bags, throw them in the Impala and get the hell out of here.”

“I’m- I’m not _running away_ , Dean.  I can’t, that’s- I- No.” Castiel feels his anxiety bubbling to the surface. Run away? Dean Winchester, _Dean Winchester_ , wants him to run away? With him? He has _responsibilities_. His parents would _kill_ him. They would track him down and _kill him_ and his _brothers_ , what would they think? And Anna? And-

“C’mon Cas. This place is too small. We can’t be ourselves here, we could make for a big city, we could _live_.” Dean looks excited, as if he honestly thinks they could do it. “I was going to leave anyway; the only thing here for me is Sammy but I already know he’s gonna make it farther than I ever could. This place could burn for all I care. But you could come with me.”

Cas is shaking his head and breathing hard. This boy, this beautiful and incredible boy, wants him to just drop everything and _leave_? They only _just_ graduated; Cas won’t even be eighteen for another two months. “How are we supposed to even get by?”

Dean grins. “Are? You said ‘are’. Does that mean you’ll go with me?”

“Answer the question please.”

He shrugs, still grinning. “Depends. If we wanna settle down somewhere, I can work all kinds of odd jobs and it wouldn’t be much of an issue. If we wanna keep wandering or if it takes a while before we find somewhere to settle, I can hustle pool pretty well. I’ll make sure we’re fine, promise.”

Cas tries to take a deep breath but it’s shaky going in and shakier going out. “That’s so unsustainable Dean. We couldn’t possibly-“

“Cas, what is there for you here?” Dean cuts in. He isn’t being aggressive, but he’s persistent and eager enough that Cas can feel his heart melting the walls around it. “Honestly? There’s your family, sure, but I’m not tellin’ you to forget about them or cut them all off. I’m just sayin’... you should do something for _you_ , you should do something rebellious, you should do something to tell them that they don’t own you; you should do what _you_ want. And sure, maybe I’m askin’ you to come with me because that’s what _I_ want, but I’m also giving you a chance to be free from their bs. Buddy, we could do _anything_.”

If this is what love is, then Cas wants no part of it. He knows that agreeing is stupid but he wants to. He wants to do anything to make Dean happy right now. But nothing is certain and the future seems so far away but maybe this is the first step he needs. Cas says nothing.

Dean leans in and kisses him softly, the kind of kiss they save for blessed out cuddles. Or for when Dean wants Cas to do something for him. “Cas, it’s already me and you against the world. We could make it. We’ll be fine as long as we stick together, yeah?”

Cas finds himself nodding along. His family would be fine without him. He could still go to college. He could find a job wherever they choose to stay. They could make it. “How about,” Cas licks his lips. They’re too dry and so is his throat but he wants to do this. He does. “How about, if we do this and we make it for the two months until I turn eighteen and have access to my trust fund, we stay at it. Is that fair?”

Blue eyes meet Green and Dean nods enthusiastically.  “Pack your bags Angel, I’ll pick you up tomorrow night.” Cas lets out one last shaky breath before grinning widely at Dean. “We’re one step closer but still so far away.” Cas kisses him squarely on the mouth before they head in different directions to get their shit together.

Three years later they’ve settled in New York. Cas is studying to be a professor in art history and he convinced Dean to major in civil engineering. They agreed to get married, purely for the benefits it guaranteed and Cas decided that “the right person” wasn’t going to come along. He was happy though, because he had Dean and Dean had him and that’s all either of them really needed.


End file.
